Yes, this dirty dirty, nearly Mapplethorpe-ian photo of a bunch of sexy young people frolicking (as they so often do, or so I'm told) with their pants falling off. See that kid in the front, why you can practically give him a full proctological exam. It's a scandal!

Fortunately, Virginia Police decided to drop the charges. Hopefully because they realized that this whole thing is fucking stupid. But still I'm left with a few questions:

1) Are there no plumbers in VA Beach? Are there no gangstas with jeans sagging to mid-crotch and boxers 3 sizes too big?

2) What exactly is the specific "threat" to "juveniles" that the above picture causes? Will they discover their own asses? Does this picture flagrantly promote the unhealthy act of being sexy and black & white in a meadow while jogging? The only thing this this picture is going to do is the same thing Abercrombie imagery has been doing for years and years, making gay kids realize what they already know and let closeted frat boys pretend they just like the clothes.

3) You know where the real problem is? The VA Beach PD/County Attorney/City Council, that already have such a tremendously good view of asses (their own, from the inside) that they would pursue this as an issue in the first place. I hope to hell that there is not a Victoria's Secret in this mall, and if there is, I hope they have to shutter their windows so that kids walking by are never exposed to anything even remotely sexualized. That way they can be cloistered and rife with body-shame for the rest of their lives. Oop, I just checked (thanks internet) and they do have a Victoria's on the lower level near Dillard's. I guess they must just sell housecoats and robes at that one, eh?

Seriously, people. Stop being so sex-negative. And to balance my rage: Kids, pull your damned pants up, you look stupid. Unless you look like these youngsters and are frolicking. If so, then stop teasing, drop trou and give us a real show.

That is all.

Huzzah